Friendship to save the Sex
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Posted:Nov 26, 2013 5:35 am
Last Updated:Nov 27, 2015 6:38 am
7591 Views
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Friendship to save the Sex
We have all heard that sex ruins a friendship. I recall a funny episode of Seinfeld where Jerry and a female on the show decided that they were going to have sex, despite their friendship. They came up with a logical twist about how they were using sex to save the friendship. They both agreed they did not want to, but they would make that great sacrifice to save their friendship, which was truly valuable to them. Truth is certainly stranger than fiction. I am starting to understand that true intimacy is a prerequisite for the best, most intense, healthy sex two or more people can have. That type of connection with another is only possible with the establishment of a friendship. I think we all know who our friends are intuitively, but we may intellectually consider them a pain in the ass. A true friend is a person who will sacrifice a great deal so that our lives are better. They are not all placed with such a burden, but many of us have had an experience where we learn who our real friends are... when everyone who was there during the good times abandons us, when those who said what made us feel good about ourselves have deserted us, and all that remains are those who would calmly and quietly tell us things that hurt more than anything else; it was not an insult nor a epithet, but the statements could make us feel like a young being punished for something that we then, for the first time, realized was not right. Of course we often resorted to anger or humor to minimize this feeling, and we would argue with this person; going round and round in logical circles as if we were trying to establish who had the most endurance. Often we would "win." It was not that we had established that we were right and they were wrong, but they were the first to be an example of humility and let go... we had appeared in our own minds to have won the race... because we let the drag us farther down the track... and what is often not realized is that their understanding that we would hold on to the death if necessary was their motivation to let go early and suffer in some way; be it criticism or rejection, but they cared... They cared enough for themselves as well as for us.
What I have learned from these examples is how important it is for my happiness to be sure that I am minimizing the amount of pain and suffering I cause others and to help lift their emotional burdens. It is time for me to do what was so freely done for me by others. I can do that by looking at every person as a valuable being. Get to know their insides, their foundations, their supports. If this occurs, myself and many others will build relationships where there are wonderful sexual experiences, and none of the heart wrenching emotional abuse that so many apparently happy couples and families ultimately suffer. Sex can never ruin a friendship, though it can destroy an associate or an acquaintance. Friendship, love... these things allow for intimacy,.. and that is the key to amazing sex!
...take a look at my profile!
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Journey...
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Posted:Jan 18, 2014 1:32 am
Last Updated:Sep 10, 2014 4:58 pm
7443 Views
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Journey....
People are at different points in their journeys. We all have intellectual, emotional, and spiritual development. The development within all of these is going to be perverted and become immature for anyone raised in modern society. The dumbing down of our school systems and people still not graduated or getting a GED is undeniable evidence of Intellectual development gone awry. However, our emotional and spiritual development are not valued the same way as it was by civilizations of old. People cited "progress" as a way to end human suffering, to prevent families from dying of starvation, of hypothermia, etc. In a day where every human can be clothed, fed, and sheltered (physically) the emotional and spiritual development of most seem to be infected by a cancer that western medicine could never arrest. Just as you have indicated that speaking something to others gives it power.. a power that motivates you to eventually do what you are "putting off 'till another day" those things you need/want to do, there so to is the status of our emotional and spiritual itineraries.
I will never truly love another until I learn to love myself. Unfortunately there no longer seem to be those qualified to teach, nor any establishment that offers the course in.... Love. I suspect that is one of the reasons we are here.... as spiritual beings have a human experience. The process of transitioning from mere existing (yes, hell is here on earth) to living is one of tremendous growth emotionally and spiritually. Just as it gets harder for someone to get their GED the longer they procrastinate it after not completing HS, so to is it more difficult to get ourselves " back on track" heading towards "living".
Fortunately, there is a great motivator for such growth. That motivator is pain. Once we experience enough pain and can no longer find refuge in the methods and people who helped/allowed us to either suppress or ignore that pain, then will a person make those changes in their life of greatest value and importance. That occurs by focusing our attention inward instead of outward; moving from finding fault to solutions; from selfish to selfless. Oddly enough, true compassion for others will be to allow them their own experiences. I recall a time that I now view as me switching between attempting to cause some to suffer (anyone who treated me in a fashion I felt was "un-called for") and helping to alleviate the suffering of others (I thought this was noble because I helping others). This outward focus is something that I think everyone experiences. It saddens me to think that many may never develop beyond this state because the very thing they need to do is frowned upon by society: becoming self centered, viewing one's self as #1, taking care of ourselves first... because when it deploys, place it firmly around yourself, then assist others (I think most catch the oxygen mask on an airplane association)
younfunlover
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I've got balls
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Posted:Aug 27, 2013 3:34 pm
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2014 2:59 am
7669 Views
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-------------------- -------------------- -------------------- ----
As originally posted by grh3man; re-posted by 91019fan
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It doesn't really take balls to do the right thing
Should make you think..
I know way too many really beautiful girls who think they don't look good... It hurts... because it's our fault, guys I mean. We make girls feel like they have to be perfect. You know what I mean, flat stomach, big boobs, round booty, long legs, sexy lips, and on top of all that, they have to dress like a , and be one as well... nobody can measure up to that... and its not fair... because nobody should have to. Girls prefer being called beautiful instead of hott or sexy. The little imperfections are what make people special. If everyone was perfect the world would be so boring, variety is what makes life interesting. So guys, stop making girls have to live up to your fantasies! I'm sorry, our... deluded fantasy visions of perfection. Stop acting like boys and start being men... realize that women don't exist to fufill our sexual desires. Stop talking to them solely to get with them, be nice to them because you want to be their friend, not because you want to hook up with them. Say nice things about them not to flatter them in hopes that you'll get some, but because its true and you know they like to hear them. In short... we need to grow up and stop acting like little boys.
Girls who agree, repost as "every girls' dream guy". and to the few guys who have balls and agree, repost this as "I've got balls"
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